Two weeks to go

I posted this a.m. that I'm super nervous about My Little Man's first day of (public school) first grade. It's so huge, public school that is. My fear is based on two things... I'm so afraid he will get lost in the huge machine that is the US education system. I have taught in a public school, I know first hand how difficult it is to meet the needs of the students who struggle, who excel, who came to school having not eaten for the night or weekend, who ate sugar for breakfast, and who's parents spent an hour reading and doing math flash cards, and those who are precocious, etc. Then my second issue is that I have to give up a lot of control and trust a lot of people and systems that I have no knowledge of. He will walk down my driveway, presumably (I don't even know yet) get on the bus sit next to a bully? When he's on the play ground will some creep try to lure him away? Will he advocate for himself with his friends, classmates, teachers, other adults in a polite and respectful manner? If he needs something will he ask. Will he say, "No." if he needs to? Will he stand up for himself? Will he stand up for others? Will he eat? Will he feel overwhelmed and lost? Will he feel like he has accomplished something?

In the past first, I knew his teachers-well, very well, too well almost, but I also knew his classroom, the building, the parents of the other children. Some may call that control (I would), but I'm out of control on this one and have no clear expectations, AHHHH!

It's just school for goodness sakes, millions of children accomplish this everyday. He'll have a great year, I know he will because we talk to him. We'll help him solve the bully issue, teach him to advocate for himself more, feel proud of himself. And I am very excited that he may get to meet other children with similar interests; I know he is really longing for that. But darn it, it's scary!